I struggle to hear my grandchildren. Do I have hearing loss?

I Can't Hear My Grandchildren. Do I Have Hearing Loss?

What to do if you find it difficult to hear the grandkids

Overview     |    The challenge with children's voices     |    Common signs you might have hearing loss     |    How to communicate with your grandchildren     |    Tips for better communication    |    When to seek help    |    Conclusion

Is your hearing becoming muffled?  Especially when trying to hear children?

The excited squeals and the whispered secrets are all the sounds of childhood and the sounds of grandchildren. But for many grandparents, these moments can become muffled, and the ability to fully participate can be significantly reduced.

Age-related hearing loss, or presbycusis, is a common condition affecting a huge portion of older adults in the UK. It often creeps in gradually, and you might find yourself turning up the TV a bit louder or asking people to repeat themselves more often. However, the real impact is often felt most in conversations with grandchildren.

Struggling to hear your grandchildren can be both upsetting and isolating.  If you, as a grandparent, are having trouble hearing and notice changes in how you interact or communicate, it might be a sign of hearing loss.

In this article, we talk about the effects of hearing loss on you, your family, and your grandchildren, along with the signs to look out for, useful communication strategies, and when to seek help.

The difficulty with children's voices and family gatherings

Children's voices are higher-pitched and can be particularly difficult to understand and hear. What should be an easy conversation can become strained, and the frustration isn't just with you. Grandchildren may become discouraged, feel disconnected, and start to withdraw from communicating. 

Family gatherings might also become overwhelming, as the chaos of multiple conversations, laughter, and background noise creates a barrier, isolating you as grandparents.  The fear of mishearing can lead to a retreat from actively participating.

Related reading: Age-related hearing loss

Signs you, as a grandparent, might have hearing loss

Older grandchildren may start to notice that you are struggling with your hearing, or they might feel that their relationship with you has become strained. For example, they might pick up on these common signs of hearing loss:

• Misunderstanding words or phrases
• Frequently asking them to repeat things
• Acting differently or not quite yourself
• Avoiding conversations at family gatherings or in noisy places like restaurants
• Becoming less social or withdrawn
• Appearing more tired or fatigued than usual
• Turning the TV volume up too high for comfort
• Struggling to hear properly on the phone

The emotional toll of hearing loss

The emotional toll is significant, as grandparents, you may feel a profound sense of loss for the sounds that are no longer fully accessible. Feelings of inadequacy and isolation can take hold, impacting your overall well-being. It's not just about missing words; it's about feeling less 'in the thick of it' and more of an observer.

Hearing loss can affect the entire family dynamic. Children may feel hurt or confused by your seeming disinterest, not realising it's a matter of hearing, not attention. Parents may find themselves acting as constant intermediaries, repeating conversations and feeling the strain of bridging the communication gap.

Hearing loss is manageable and a common part of ageing

But this doesn't have to be the case; hearing loss is not an obstacle that can't be tackled. It's a medical condition, and like many others, it can be successfully managed. The first step, and often the hardest, is recognising the problem and seeking professional help.

Beyond hearing aids, if needed, there are other strategies that your family can employ. Creating a quiet environment for conversations, speaking clearly, staying facing you, and using visual cues can all help bridge the communication gap.  Patience, understanding, and a willingness to adapt are also key.

Related reading:  Communication strategies for those with hearing loss

How to talk to your grandchildren about hearing loss

Children often have a habit of swallowing their words or blending them together, and their voices are usually softer and higher-pitched.  Their speech patterns can make it difficult to understand them, but when combined with hearing loss, particularly age-related hearing loss, which tends to affect higher frequencies, it becomes even more challenging.

Teaching them the most effective way to communicate with you will require patience and plenty of repetition, but it’s definitely worth the effort. Share the tips below, and before long, it will become second nature to them.

Tips for better conversations with your grandchildren

1. Explain your hearing loss:  Let them know it’s harder for you to hear them. Show them your hearing aids (once diagnosed and if you now wear them) and explain that your ears don’t work as well as theirs.
2. Ask for their attention:  Tell them it’s easier for you to hear if they get your attention before speaking. This helps you focus on what they’re saying and makes understanding the conversation easier.
3. Ensure they’re facing you:  Let them know that seeing their lips helps you hear better. 
4. Minimise background noise:  Ask them to lower the volume of music or move away from noisy areas.  Good lighting helps with lip-reading, so encourage bright spaces when talking.
5. Encourage turn-taking:  Teach them to wait their turn to speak. Children often get excited and speak over one another, but taking turns will help you follow the conversation more easily.
6. Speak at a normal pace:  Ask them to speak clearly and at a normal pace. Shouting or speaking too quickly can make it harder for you to understand. 
7. Ask for clarification if you miss something:  If you don’t catch a word, don’t hesitate to ask them to clarify or rephrase.
8. Get down to their level:  Engaging in their activities, like playing with toys, will make it easier for them to communicate with you.

Seeking professional help

For grandparents, taking that first step can be transformative.  Hearing tests are readily available on the NHS and through private providers. An audiologist can assess the extent of the hearing loss and recommend appropriate solutions based on your needs and preferences. For many, hearing aids can make a remarkable difference.

Modern devices are sophisticated, discreet, and tailored to unique needs. They can amplify high-pitched voices, filter out background noise, and restore the joy of clear communication. 

Don't let hearing loss stop you from reconnecting with grandchildren

Age-related hearing loss is a natural part of life, but it doesn't have to isolate you from your grandchildren or family. By acknowledging the challenge and seeking the right support, you can reclaim those precious connections.

Take the first step today and speak to an audiologist, explore solutions, and consider how small changes can make a big difference.  Contact us today to schedule a free hearing assessment, either in a local clinic or at your home with one of our professional audiologists.